Parade Of Lost Souls 2008

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How To Get Kicked Out Of A Circle

(by "circle" I mean a ritual circle...witchy stuff!! hehe!)

How to get kicked out of a circle

1. Take the sword from the altar and say, "Luke, I am your Father" and make light saber sounds.

2. During cakes and wine, act like a wine snob and critique it.

3. When chanting the names of the Goddess, randomly add Barbie.

4. When chanting the names of the God, randomly add the names of wrestlers.

5. Invoke Satan

6. Check and send text messages to and from your friends on your cell phone.

7. Take out a bible and start evangelizing.

8. During cakes and wine, accuse the High Priestess of sexually harassing you.

9. In a sky clad circle, take pictures with your cell phone.

10. When the Gods are being invoked, lean on the altar to stretch out your legs.

11. Light cigarettes and cigars off the Goddess candle.

12. Insist that it should be your turn to flog the initiates.

13. In a sky clad circle, loudly rank everyone's boobs on a scale of 1 to 10.

14. Continuously point out loudly and often whenever you have a hard-on and ask for compliments on it.

15. Be sure never to miss an opportunity to make a farting sound when anyone bends over or sits down.

16. Ask if the good stuff is over so you can be cut out of the circle to catch the last part of American Idol.

17. When you're asked to call the quarters, go to the first point and call the quarters. Move to the second point and call the dimes, proceed on to calling the pennies and the nickles, all the while having one hand in your pocket jingling the change there as a coinage accompaniment.

18. Leave your cell phone on and arrange for a friend to call you during a moment of reverent silence or general moment of focus.

19. Polock jokes!

20. say "In accordance with the prophecy" after every sentence.

21. At key points in the ritual make "In Soviet Russia..." jokes.

22. In a skyclad circle, stand there and urinate, especially effective if done at the calling of a god or goddess.

23. Why evangelize to the pagans when you can wait a bit and start evangelizing to the gods?

24. The well placed magic words, "YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG!" yelled with sudden strength and conviction at a choice moment.

25. Blot using antifreeze, motor oil or some other disgusting substance.

26. Puke in the drinking horn, chalice ect.

27. interrupting an invocation of the Horned One and saying, "I got your horny god, right here, baby!"

28. Use trick candles that don't go out.

29. During cakes and wine say "body of Christ".

30. In a skyclad circle, scratch your naughty bits with the wand.

31. If they say "As above, so below" Follow it with "ready or not, here we go"

32. Add cumin or sulphur to the incense in the cauldron.

33. Smudge someone with Right Guard.

34. Slip what looks like a roophy into the chalice, then refuse to drink.

35. Pick your teeth with the athame.

36. Use a kitten as an athame

37. Fart or belch loudly while calling the eastern quarter and then say So Mote It Be!

38. In the middle of everything start singing"swing your partner, do-se-do, almand left and a way we go!"

39. In a skyclad ritual, deffacate or urinate while walking and act offended when people give you bad looks as your proudly declare yourself a naturalist.

40. Hail Fred Flinstone. After all, he is one of your ancient ancestors, no?

41. Yell at everyone there, constantly.

42.Yell at everyone not there, constantly.

43. Ask the gods to bless your upcoming raid of Wally World.

44. Back your car into the circle in the middle of ritual.

45. Claim to be able to keep people with magic, with a touch, with a thought... whatever.

46. Ramble incoherent nonsense and swear it is Old Norse (note: do this in from of people wo'd clearly kno otherwise).

47. Throw the gods some spare change.

48. Oh hell, just throw spare change at people.

49. During ritual, come out of nowhere on a riding mower claiming to represent the Green Man.

50. Two evil words: HORNED HELMET!

51. Toss a cat. You heard me, toss a cat.

52. Perform the Lesser Banishing of Captain Crunch.

53. Claim that Alister Clrowly is attacking you in your dreams or claim to have been him in a past life, to be him now or that he is your spirit guide, etc. Then proceed to display a complete and utter misunderstanding of Thalema.

54. clean your fingernails with the athame

55. grab the wand, wave it around yelling "Curse you, Voldemort!"

56. start singing at the top of your lungs "May the circle be unbroken by and by, Lord, by and by..."

57. Claim that a spell comes from your 13th generation grandmother and make sure that it is written in improper Olde English and screw up all the thee's, thou's and thy's and warn everyone about how afraid of you they should be.

58. trying to use the High Preistesses navel as an ash tray

59. drying your hands on the High Priestesses hair

60. Insist that they use YOU to represent the south 'cause "I'm on fire!!!!' *lick finger and make hissing noise as you touch your ass.

61. Fake a medical emergency by screaming that you needs LOTS of bandaids. When they ask why, start flexing and say "For all these cuuuts!"

62. Pick up every little thing you can -- candle wax drippings, a piece of hair, a blade of grass, used napkins -- and then when you get a funny look, say, "Oh! I didn't think you would mind if I kept mementos of this circle! I'm having such a great time!", this is when you step up and say, "put down the personal poppets and leave before I shave every hair off your body and make a wax effigy."

63. Run around the circle, touching everyones head as you say,"Duck, duck, goose!!"

Oíche Shamhna

Note:This article does not cover all traditions associated with this holiday and includes my own Unsubstantiated Personal Gnosis

Observed By: Irish People, Scottish People, Neopagans, Celtic Re-constructionist Pagans,

Date:Evening of October 31st to the Evening of November 1st

Related To: Hallowe'en, All Saints Day, All Souls Day

Also Known As: Samhain(Neopagan/Wiccan), Oidhche Shamhna(Scots Gaelic), Oíche Shamhna(Irish)

Pronunciation: Oíche Shamhna(Irish):ee-heh how-nah, Oidhche Shamhna(Scots Gaelic):oy-hya how-na, spoken very roughly, Samhain(Neopagan/Wiccan): sah-vwin or sow-en


Oíche Shamhna is the final harvest festival and a time for mourning the newly dead as well as venerating the ancestors. It was also known as the "meat harvest" since livestock was slaughtered for the winter at this time. So it is no surprise that death is a main component of this holiday. It comes at the time of the first frost and usually the final harvest of vegetable crops, such as pumpkins, apples, etc. This is the time of year when the veil between worlds is thinnest, some say for 3 days, October 31st to November 2nd, and is an ideal time for divination, prophecy, communing with the dead, contacting the ancestors, and starting new endeavours. This three day festival has it's routes based in the Celtic Festival of the Dead. In Ireland and Scotland, the Féile na Marbh was a 3 day period of feasting and honouring the newly dead and the ancestors. It is also considered a day if mischief as not only do the Ancestors return but so do playful if not harmful spirits. Pumpkins are carved with grotesque faces, costumes are worn, and candles are lit to ward off the restless dead. The God goes into darkness, he dies and goes to the Underworld at this time and The Crone reigns. It is considered the Witches New Year by most Neo-Pagans and Celtic based Pagan faiths, although there is no concrete evidence to suggest this at this point in time. It is also balancing kind of day for the Celtic peoples, as most of the year was ruled by strict regulation and logic, this was day for mischief and nonsense. It is also said that the modern act of carving pumpkins stems from the Celtic tradition of placing the skulls of the ancestors outside their front doors at this time of year. Originally it was turnips that were carved. Crops left in the fields at this time are considered taboo and are to be left as offerings. The Fairy Folk become very active this time of year. In Irish mythology the shield of Scathach was lowered on this evening, allowing the dead and those yet to be born to pas through and wander, the world of chaos infiltrating the world of order, the dark invading the light.

Ideas for Celebration:
- carving pumpkins/various gourds
- dressing up in costume
- Feast of the Dead, a dinner featuring seasonal foods and making sure to set a place for the Beloved Dead(make sure you give them some food and wine as well, just as if they were there in body), and don't forget to give them a chair as well.
-light two bonfires and lead yourself and any pets(or livestock if you have any) you may have between the two, a throwback to the bonfires the Celts held this time of year. The Celts would lead livestock between the two huge bonfires to purify and keep them safe from evil spirits. If you can't make any bonfires a simple candle will do, simply move the candle around the person/pets body. I believe the fire will purify no matter how big the flame.
-light a candle for the Dead and the Ancestors.
-write down a weakness on a piece of paper and throw it into the fire to be rid of it
-harvesting
-butchering
-divination
-scrying
-telling scary stories or tales of your ancestors
-leave a candle in the window to help spirits find their way home
-leave food/offerings on the front step or altar for the wandering dead
-bury apples along roadsides or paths for the dead who have no one to mourn or leave offerings for them



Symbols:
-jack o' lanterns
-fall leaves
-pumpkins, seasonal gourds and squashes
-bonfires
-masks
-brooms
-cauldrons
-waning moon
-apples/seasonal fruit
-black cats
-scythe

Herbs:
-Mugwort
-Allspice
-Broom
-Catnip
-Deadly Nightshade
-Mandrake
-Oak Leaves
-Sage
-Straw

Colours:
-red
-black
-silver
-orange
-white
-silver
-gold

Incense:
-Heliotrope
-Nutmeg
-Mint

Foods:
-turnips
-apples
-gourds
-squash
-nuts
-mulled wines
-meat

Stones:
-all black stones








Sources:
CR FAQ - Holidays
Wikipedia - Samhain
Irish Culture and Customs
Pro Z - The Translation Workplace
Pagan Pages - Samhain
The Celtic Year
Celebrate The Celtic Year
Wiccan, Pagan, and Witchcraft Holidays
Wikipedia - Festival of the Dead
Samhain

Deathways Open Doors to Unexpected Cultural Practices

UB historian studies death in the New World

Contact

Patricia Donovan

pdonovan@buffalo.edu

716-645-5000 ext 1414

Release Date: October 8, 2008

BUFFALO, N.Y. -- Cremation, "air burial," grave cairns, funeral mounds, mummification, belief in life after death -- death practices sacred to one culture are often considered "odd" or even terrifying by another.

The Greeks, for example, were fascinated with the historian Herodotus' description of the ancient Issedonians chopping up their dead into a mixed grill and devouring them in a communal barbeque, something entirely contrary to the Greeks' treatment of their own dead.

Please read the full article HERE

Parade of the Lost Souls - Vancouver, Canada

Parade of the Lost Souls

Starts at Britannia Oval
October 25, 2008 - 6:30pm - 10:30pm

Life and Death mix and mingle at the Parade of the Lost Souls, which will be returning on Commercial Drive at Grandview Park.

Please see the full listing HERE

Myths of the Raven

The myths and meanings of the Tower of London ravens

By Jeffrey Vallance

November 2007

(FT206:30-36)

“If the Tower of London ravens are lost or fly away, the Crown will fall and Britain with it.”

In the summer of 2004, I was in London to give a lecture in connection with the exhibition “This much is certain” at the Royal College of Art. Previously, I had researched raven lore, heard the Tower of London raven legend, and wanted to see the Tower ravens first-hand. I came upon the portentous birds just before noon, after seeing an informative display of fake torture instruments in the Bloody Tower. The ravens were to my right, just west of the White Tower. They were gathered by their cages, situated at ground level atop a grassy mound near the ruin of the Wall of the Innermost Ward. A sign was posted: “Warning: Ravens Bite.” An ominous black raven turned my way, croaked, and then casually picked up a stick in her beak.

The Innermost Ward was an enclosed area once reserved for royalty and nobles of the court. The Ward’s crumbling 13th-century rampart wall is pierced by gaping holes that once served as embrasures (narrow slits for arrows). Purportedly, a ghostly figure has been observed glaring through the apertures in the wall – vanishing only to reappear at each hole all along the deteriorating ruin. It is behind this haunted wall that the ghastly ravens make their doleful nests.

The ravens’ favourite haunt is the Tower Green, the former site of royal beheadings. In 1536, Anne Boleyn was beheaded here. After her head was severed, the executioner held it up, and for a moment the eyes and lips continued to move. It is claimed that her bluish, headless ghost still wanders the vicinity. A gruesome shadow of a huge executioner’s axe has also been seen gliding across the Green. Traditionally, ravens are thought to be prophetic birds and are associated with execution sites and graveyards. The raven coop is placed quite close to the Bloody Tower. In 1483, the Little Princes (12-year-old King Edward V and his nine-year-old brother Richard, Duke of York) were brought to the Bloody Tower, and subsequently disappeared from history; many assume they were brutally murdered. In 1647, workmen tearing up a staircase found the bones of two children purported to be the Princes. It is said that on bleak and dreary nights, the ghostly figures of the Little Princes, dressed in white nightclothes, stand silently hand in hand before slowly fading away. At times their soft weeping can be heard after dark near the raven roost.

Sir Walter Raleigh was also imprisoned in the Bloody Tower for 13 years before he finally got the axe. His phantom has been seen floating noiselessly through the various rooms. The Beefeaters from time to time even report smelling the phantom aroma of roast beef in the White Tower after nightfall. When the Tower ghosts make their appearances, the ravens become unusually agitated and will not settle down. The 1962 MGM horror film classic The Tower of London, based on Shakespeare’s Richard III, stars Vincent Price as the demented despot haunted by grim ravens and the forlorn ghosts of his victims.

According to tradition, the curious raven prophecy can be traced back to the “Merry Monarch”, Charles II (1660-1685). On 22 June 1675, the King established the Royal Observatory at the Tower of London, housed in the north-eastern turret of the White Tower. The Royal Astronomer, John Flamsteed (1646-1719), allegedly complained to the King that the birds were interfering with his celestial observations. Charles therefore ordered their demise – only to be forewarned by an obscure soothsayer that: “if the ravens left the Tower, the White Tower would collapse and a great disaster befall the Kingdom”. There are various similar versions of the legend, but all maintain that a horrible catastrophe would be visited upon the country if all the ravens quit the Tower. After hearing the warning, the King decreed that at least six ravens be kept at the Tower at all times to prevent such a calamity. Now the birds’ wings are routinely clipped so they cannot escape.

For an example of ravens forcibly expelled from a castle tower, bringing forth a dismal curse, just look at the ill-fated Hapsburg dynasty. The Hapsburgs were rulers of the Holy Roman Empire (962-1806), and they had in their possession the miraculous Holy Lance. Long ago, the castle tower of their ancestral Schlöss Hapsburg had many ravens flying about and merrily making nests everywhere, until one day the Hapsburgs cruelly exterminated every last one of them.

This was the origin of the Hapsburg Curse. From then on, the Hapsburgs were haunted by supernatural ravens called Turnfalken, whose every appearance presaged doom to members of the imperial family. Numerous times in history the foreboding Turnfalken have been seen in Vienna soaring above the Schönbrunn and Hofburg palaces. It has been claimed that in Paris the ravens were seen hovering and screeching over Marie Antoinette as she was guillotined, in Mexico when Emperor Maximilian was shot by the firing squad, at Mayerling when Prince Rudolf and his lover Countess Maria Vetsera consummated their suicide pact (although some say they were murdered), and at Sarajevo when Archduke Ferdinand was assassinated – triggering World War I and the crumbling Hapsburg empire’s final demise.

Possibly related to the London Tower legend are other raven folktales, superstitions, and legends. According to Cornish folklore, the spirit of King Arthur is said to dwell in ravens, and for this reason it is considered unlucky and even sacrilegious to kill one. An age-old superstition states if all the ravens in a wood suddenly forsake it, surely disaster will follow. Another Tower raven legend chronicled in the Mabinogion states that upon the death of the giant king Bran the Blessed (bran means raven in Welsh), his head was cut off and buried at the “White Hill” in London, (usually identified as Tower Hill) “with the face turned towards France”. This burial is known in the Welsh Triads as one of the Three Happy Concealments of The Island of the Mighty. As long as Bran’s head stays buried there, Britain will be safe from invasion. It is as if these older legends, folktales, and superstitions fused to form the current Tower of London raven legend.

It is claimed that the ravens have been at the Tower of London since the 13th century, and for the last 400 years they have been protected by royal decree. However, Geoff Parnell, the official Tower of London historian, recently scoured records dating back a millennium and found no reference to the ravens before an 1895 article in an RSPCA journal, The Animal World. One Edith Hawthorn referred to the Tower’s pet cat being tormented by the ravens, Jenny and a nameless mate. A menagerie was kept at the Tower by generations of monarchs for at least 600 years until it became the foundation of London Zoo. There were hawks, lions, leopards, monkeys and even a polar bear – but no mention of ravens. Besides, the Duke of Wellington, who dismantled the menagerie in 1835, wanted to get dangerous animals out of the way of his garrison and would hardly have tolerated six sharp-beaked ravens hanging around. Dr Parnell’s research suggests that some ravens may have been a punning gift to the Tower by the third Earl of Dunraven (1812-71), an archæologist and antiquarian fascinated by Celtic raven myths, who added ravens to his family coat of arms. Some now believe the raven legend is a Victorian invention, but we can’t be certain. Absence of evidence isn’t evidence of absence.

Ravens are now a protected species in Britain. The Tower birds are cared for by one of the Yeoman Warders (known as Beefeaters) with the regal title of Ravenmaster. The current Ravenmaster, Derrick Coyle, a former Sergeant Major, has been at the Tower for 20 years, first serving as Deputy Ravenmaster before becoming full-time Ravenmaster six years ago. Coyle’s arms are full of nasty scars, evidence of the ravens’ powerful bills and razor-sharp talons – he stoically calls them “love taps.” The birds are fed kitchen scraps, an occasional rabbit, and the odd roadkill that the Ravenmaster happens to pick up. The ravens Odin and Thor, brothers, used to mimic the Ravenmaster’s voice, including the vocalisations, “Come on then!” and “Good morning.” Sadly, however, these two birds passed away in 2003.

It has been observed (not infrequently) that when a member of the flock perishes, the birds will hold what could be called a “raven funeral” – a 24-hour event marked by raucous outcries. The Ravenmaster buries the dead bird in the Raven Cemetery located in the drained moat close to the Watergate and the St Thomas Tower. (St Thomas is the patron saint of clergy.) There is a special Raven Memorial Headstone that lists all ravens buried there from 1956 onwards. (Incidentally, in England, tombstones are sometimes referred to as “ravenstones”.) The St Thomas Tower is also known as Traitors’ Gate because it was through this Tower that condemned prisoners accused of treason arrived from Westminster. The Tower is named in honour of Sir Thomas Becket, whose apparition has been seen striking the walls of the building with a crucifix, loudly proclaiming it was not made for the common good but “for the injury and prejudice of the Londoners, my brethren”.

As I wrote this in Southern California, a raven-black crow fell from the sky and landed dead on my driveway. I buried it in the backyard (under a spare headstone originally carved for Blinky the Friendly Hen - see FT53:23). I worried about my freshly deceased feathered friend, especially since a dead crow can indicate that the West Nile Virus is in the region. Up in Southeast Alaska, a mysterious life-threatening beak deformity is now affecting crows and ravens. The deformity can cause beaks to grow up to three times their normal size and prevent regular feeding, and in many birds it leads to death. The cause of the phenomenon is unknown.

Today the Tower strictly maintains the decree-required six ravens. Their names are, appropriately, Hugine, Munin, Bran, Branwen, Gwyllum, and Cedric. (The Norse god Odin had two raven familiars named Huginn and Muninn who perched on his shoulders and told him everything they saw and heard. I wonder if the current monarchy has the same arrangement.) Each Tower raven can be identified by a different coloured leg band. Ravens can live a long time – the oldest was Jim Crow, who died at the age 44 (and by the way, there is a bourbon whiskey called ‘Old Crow’).

To anyone from the States, the name Jim Crow sounds inappropriate as a name for a raven, as it is a derogatory term for a Black person. The era of the Jim Crow laws (the “black codes,” 1877 to the mid-1960s) is one of the most appalling and shameful periods in American history – a time of racial discrimination, segregation, and lynch mobs. The term “Jim Crow” is derived from a character in an antebellum minstrel show contrived by Thomas Dartmouth “Daddy” Rice, a white actor who was one of the first to wear blackface to do stereotypical imitations of Negro performers (paving the way for such entertainers as Al Jolson). Daddy Rice did his Jim Crow song-and-dance routine to astounding acclaim from audiences in New York and London.

During World War II, the grim raven prophecy almost came to pass, as only one raven (named Grip) was left at the Tower. The other birds were killed by bombing or pined and died of shock during the Blitz. In fact, the ravens’ cages are built on the ruined foundation of the Main Guard tower (or Queen Victoria’s Canteen), destroyed on 29 December 1940 by a Nazi incendiary bomb. In 1944, the gutted Main Guard building was demolished, revealing the mediæval Wall of the Innermost Ward. When the Tower reopened to the public on 1 January 1946, there were six ravens once again.

In 1981, a raven named Grog managed to escape from the Tower after 21 years’ service and was last spotted scavenging outside the Rose and Punchbowl pub in London’s East End. The birds are treated not as pets but as military personnel. They are “enlisted” and can be “dismissed” like soldiers for unbecoming behaviour. In 1986, a raven called George, “enlisted in 1975”, was dismissed for “conduct unsatisfactory” and sent to the Welsh Mountain Zoo. He “received his marching orders” after demolishing television aerials.

A trickster raven named Rhys, a skilful mimic, used to get behind groups of people and start barking like a dog. People would look around for the dog, while Rhys would run off, cackling to himself. Then there is the sad story of the “Two Charlies”. While preparing for a royal visit by Queen Elizabeth, a bomb-sniffing dog named Charlie was sent in. A raven also named Charlie pecked Charlie the dog, who then took the bird in his mouth and bit down hard, killing him.

According to documentation released under the Freedom of Information Act in February 2005, the Tower ravens are under threat from an invasion of 200 crows a day and these common cousins are being shot to protect the ravens from diseases and competition for food. The cull takes place before tourists arrive. The RSPB said it was legal to shoot urban crows to protect the ravens, but the law was being reviewed. However, wild ravens could soon be nesting at the Tower again after being found breeding near the capital for the first time in 180 years. Nests have been recorded in Bedfordshire, Sussex, Berkshire and Hampshire. Although once common in London, where they scavenged on refuse and the bodies hanging in gibbets at the Tower, ravens last nested in the wild in Hyde Park in 1826.

My raven research was enhanced by a pamphlet given to me by FT founding co-editor Paul Sieveking, entitled Coracomancy: Raven Crow(s) Behaviour (translated from Tibetan). According to the pamphlet, “There are expressions in the language and behaviour of ravens and crows which accurately convey messages and portents. These can be interpreted, if observed and understood correctly.” By use of coracomancy, I attempted to divine the calls and conduct of the Tower ravens I encountered. A raven crowing at mid-morning until mid-day from the west means “a long distance will be travelled”. (That was certain – I faced an exhausting 10-hour flight back to Los Angeles.) While travelling near a river (the Tower is, of course, next to the Thames), a raven crowing from the right side predicts “the journey will be successful”. (My trip did go rather well.)

A raven sitting on a castle at any time means “good lodgings will be found”. (The St Margaret hotel near the British Museum proved to be quite good. St Margaret is the patron saint of queens.) A raven holding a stick or piece of wood foretells “something will be found”. (I found a flake of the Tower that had crumbled off, and I saved it as a relic.) Concerning signs by location of nests, when a raven makes its nest in a wall, on the ground, or by water, it predicts “the King (or Queen) will prosper”. (I wondered if the Ravenmaster had read the Coracomancy pamphlet and placed the ravens’ nests on the ground near a wall – precisely in the perfect position for English Royalty to prosper.) It was the raven named Munin who gave me that piercing sideways stare with her beady jet-black eyes as she crowed “ka-ka” in a high-pitched voice, which translates as “wealth will be obtained”. (Once again the raven’s prediction was flawless, as I was subsequently notified that I would receive a major research grant.) I was amazed that the raven prognostications were all right on the money.

Original article posted HERE

I'm feeling disturbed...

This is possibly on of the CREEPIEST things I have EVER seen!
I'm all for artistic expression and what not...but WHY would you want to do this???
I've read that young serial killers will play with road kill....

http://stoproadkill.org/

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